


Hold On

by PlatonicRabbit



Series: Samifer Love Week 2016 [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Dreamwalking, Gen, Hugging, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Episode: s05e19 Hammer of the Gods, referenced fratricide, vaguely referenced character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-02
Updated: 2016-08-02
Packaged: 2018-07-28 21:19:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7657120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PlatonicRabbit/pseuds/PlatonicRabbit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the aftermath of Elysian Fields, Sam struggles to decide how he should act.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hold On

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mythpoetry](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mythpoetry/gifts).



> Thursday, July 28th: Episode Codas/fix-its

Sam isn't sure he wants to fall asleep that night, whether he wants to confront the aftermath of what must have happened back at the hotel, quite so soon. But inevitably, when Dean pulls into another anonymous motel parking lot around lunchtime, claiming he can't drive anymore after a sleepless night, both brothers collapse into their cardboard mattresses and pass out.

The motel room has changed.  
From the low budget, familiar room Keith had lived for weeks, it has metamorphosed into one of the suites at Elysian Fields. Sam wonders whether his subconscious or Lucifer's made the change.

From the way Lucifer is staring around the room despairingly, blood still coating his hands, Sam suspects the scenery is his own fault.

'Sorry about the...' Sam gestures around him.

Lucifer just stares blankly at him, for long enough Sam is sure Lucifer is having an episode of some kind and is about to wake himself up when the archangel finally speaks. 'It's fine, Sam. This room is fine. Don't move us downstairs.'

And Lucifer really, really doesn't know how human brains work because Sam hadn't been thinking of what must be waiting in the dining room, not really, but now it's like trying not to think of a white horse when someone's said not to. The room ripples around them and Sam desperately tries to think of anything else-

-And the they're in the backseat of the Impala, which is also not fantastic but Sam isn't complaining for now.

Lucifer stares at their surroundings again, less agonized and more curious this time. 'Castiel was right,' he says absently. 'Confining.'

Sam isn't sure whether Lucifer is talking to himself or to Sam, but either way he doesn't think the archangel is expecting a response. He doesn't really want to be here any more than Lucifer does, though, so he opens the door and climbs out. After a second, Lucifer follows him.

Sam makes for a hill in the distance, Lucifer trailing along behind him silently.

'Why are you here? I wouldn't have thought either of us were ready for a productive conversation right now,' Sam prodded gently.

Lucifer shrugged, looked up at the sky again like he was searching for something. 'I didn't know where else to go.'

The angel is lagging a few steps behind, so it's Sam who crests the hill first and sees the Hotel on the other side. He's sure there wasn't actually a giant hill outside Elysian Fields. Just his mind walking them in circles, Sam figures. Probably the same reason he'd felt compelled to keep moving in the first place after they'd shifted to the Impala. Sam turns around and sits down on the dirt, gesturing for Lucifer to do the same so he won't see what's over the rise.

Lucifer sits, cross-legged and stiff.

There's still blood crusting his clothes, and his burns are noticeably worse than they'd been a few hours ago in the hotel, as if Lucifer had used up a lot of energy in the fight. Sam wonders why he can even see the burns in a dream, whether at some point they got so bad Lucifer couldn't hide them, or if he'd just forgotten to.

Sam doesn't know what to say, how to comfort Lucifer. He knows he should, for some reason, but he has no frame of reference with which to relate to what just happened. Not without undermining his position on whether the apocalypse should go ahead.

'I know you can't sympathise.' Lucifer speaks up.

Sam glances over at him. Lucifer is staring at the sky again, like he's asking it for answers.

Belatedly Sam realises that's probably exactly what Lucifer is doing. Castiel looks to the sky too, when he's thinking about his family.

'I don't want you to tell me it's okay, Sam. It's not. I just...'

Something about this, about seeing Lucifer so broken, so helpless, is filling Sam with a deep sense of wrong, but finally, he thinks he knows what he should do about it.

Sam reaches out and pulls Lucifer into a hug, and when the angel flails, starts pushing Sam away, Sam tightens his grip. Eventually Lucifer relaxes and begins to return the hug, and his arms around Sam are more comforting than Sam could have believed. Lucifer's head is resting on Sam's shoulder and one of his hands is tangled in Sam's hair.

Sam pretends not to feel the dampness where Lucifer's face is pressing into his neck and holds on tighter.

**Author's Note:**

> Come find me at Platonic-rabbit.tumblr.com


End file.
